PSA-The Obsessive Loving Grandmother Epidemic

This is a public service announcement alerting all new moms about the threat and danger of "OLG" Syndrome.

Here is Jessica's story:


This is a picture of my mother and me hours before I gave birth to my first born child. Little did I know that this is the last picture of my mom before she came down with OLG. Her symptoms were acute and immediate and the unfortunate thing is once diagnosed with OLG there is no cure. We still work everyday to subside the side effects of OLG but we have our good days and our bad.

What is OLG Syndrome?

OLG Syndrome is the acronym for Obsessive Loving Grandmother Syndrome. Affecting mostly women, OLG Syndrome's onset is upon arrival of a woman's first born grandchild.

Presentation:

Immediate symptoms are usually crying and smiling. The OLG usually has no cell phone battery life because she snaps about 1,000 pictures and videos of the new baby hourly. More symptoms include but are not limited to:

-Taking the blankets off of the newborn to check fingers and toes
-Saying immediately which relative the child looks like
-Telling the baby's nurse how to do their job
-Taking more pictures
-Rocking the baby
-Rocking the baby some more
-Walking around the room talking to the baby
-More rocking
-Following you home from the hospital or in some cases waiting at home for you to arrive
-Staring for long periods of time at the baby and then crying
-Frequent calling to check on the baby

Unfortunately, symptoms only continue to evolve and worsen as the child gets older. The Obsessive Loving Grandmother begins to:

-Come to your house at unexpected hours and investigate when the child has last had something to eat or conversely, when the child last had a bowel movement
-Call to check and see if you need anything in order to come over and see the baby or child
-Reminds you constantly that when they had children they didn't have the computer to "look up all the answers" on the internet
-Begins to stash large amount of candy and doughnuts in her purse
-Also, tends to frequent Toys R Us, Walmart, and Target toy aisles searching for on sale toys that she just couldn't pass up because the child needs them
-Doubts the reliability of a "fancy" video monitor



Treatment:

When the OLG arrives confiscate anything that resembles candy or doughnuts as well as toys. Allow the OL grandmother to speak her mind, listening and nodding during OLG Syndrome "flair-ups". Warning, DO NOT roll your eyes at the OLG, this only worsens symptoms. The OLG tends to improve when the actual daughter or son of the OLG calls the OLG for support and advice. Symptoms subside when the OLG has ample amounts of time with the baby or children.

An update on Jessica's story:

She reports that while her mother's symptoms of OLG continue, she is actually blessed and extremely grateful to have a mom that suffers from this syndrome. Jessica states that, "My mom is the most self-sacrificing woman on the planet with a heart as big as Texas!" Jessica knows that OLG is genetic, and one day....when her children have children....she too will suffer from OLG syndrome.



I love you mom. You are the best.

"Jessa"